“How’s the weather up there?”
“Do you play basketball?”
“You’re tall! Why are you so tall!”
“How tall are you? Are your parents a couple of giraffes?”
“Bet you can see my house from up there!”
“You should play basketball! Basketball. Basketball?”
Day after day, people have to ask it. That dreaded question...There’s no avoiding it - little bouncing heads look up at me everywhere I go and wonder. And I mean, what do they expect me to say? “It's actually me, Lebron - and this is my disguise,” or “Yes, I actually wanted to be as tall as my second storey apartment, so I wouldn’t have to take the stairs to get up there. B-ball is a lucky byproduct,” or, I can choose to respond harshly with a “Yeah but my miniature golf game is going pretty badly, do you have any pointers?”
People see a tall person and because we’re different than them, think that there’s some magic thing we did to be this tall.
The weather up here, as I would describe it, is always the same. People see a tall person and because we’re different than them, think that there’s some magic thing we did to be this tall. Or that we must be basketball playing savants, and anytime spent not dribbling or making free-throws is some kind of ridiculous shame that our selfish giant hearts are robbing die-hard NBA fans of. I never really know what to say – but I have found one suggestion to help make running the court a little easier.
Have some fun with your answer, and get creative.
When a stranger starts blurting out these questions, I’ve learned that patience is the best tool to have in our tall person wheelbox. Have some fun with your answer, and get creative. Giving people a little surprise works to dissolve that weird kind of tension you feel by being approached. When you’re hit with a “do you play basketball?” try a “yep – but I do other things too!” or a “I’m more of a bowler.”
If you’re getting hit with the eventual layup to the basketball question and you get the “why are you so tall!” statement-as-a-question as a follow up, you get more room to work with. Try throwing some humour into it, and get a little silly. If you’re getting attention in the grocery store, answer with “I ate all my veggies growing up.” Or if it’s a little kid, shoot their parents a smile and answer with “If you want to be tall like me, here’s the secret: I listened to my parents” – you’ll usually get a wink from a parent, and the kid’s face is priceless.
There’s nothing wrong with being a tall person who plays basketball.
Please note that in the wrong situation, these answers could get you into some trouble – we take no responsibility for the consequences, if used. Plus, there’s nothing wrong with being a tall person who plays basketball – it’s the best fun you can find in summer, and why not bring a little advantage to the game. If these don’t help you out and make your basketball question a little easier, remember this slam dunk of an answer to the tall question: “Whoa! You should play basketball – how’d you get so tall?!” Try these two magic words. “Miracle Grow.”